bafflegab.

[baf–uh l-gab]

noun, Slang.

1. confusing or generally unintelligible jargon; gobbledegook.

I have fallen in love. He’s sensitive, snuggly, and so unbelievably cute, I can’t even describe it. He loves me back, I don’t have any doubt. He does only speak in bafflegab and gobbledegook, because he’s 18 days old. His name is Holden Pearce and when he falls asleep on my chest, my heart feels so full like it might burst. He makes a lot of unintelligible sounds but I interpret them to mean, “I’m so glad you’re in my life, Beth. I’m glad you met my parents in college and that you like each other so much. I’m glad you bring me quality children’s literature. I hope one day you’ll find the desire to settle down and have your own kids that can be my best buddies.”

He dreams sweetly and bafflegabs throughout. Carlee and I wonder what he could possibly be dreaming about at such a young age with a lack of life experience. Maybe he’s having visions of the cute penguin and his best friend from the book I brought him.