awe.

Setting: Driving home from work across the Courtney Campbell Causeway while the sun is setting.

On the radio: A song I’ve never heard by an artist I adore, Audrey Assad.

If I had been walking, this song would’ve stopped me in my tracks. And I didn’t slam on my brakes because the Courtney Campbell Causeway is a real dangerous spot to abruptly stop on.

I leaned closer to the radio controls as if that would help me hear the lyrics better. I heard the line “You caught me by surprise. It’s strange how Your glory can be seen in a firefly.”

I told my family and friends about it. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Since then (two weeks ago)  I have searched for this song. At one point I thought I had imagined the whole thing because I couldn’t find it.

I actually felt compelled to tweet, which is a rare occurrence:

“I heard @audreyassad‘s ‘Firefly’ days ago on the radio. Amazing. I haven’t searched harder for a song since Lisa Loeb’s ‘Stay’ in 1994.”

Instead of hearing from Audrey Assad (I was hoping she’d say, “Beth, here’s the link to my song. Thanks for loving it. Also, come have brunch with me in Nashville sometime”)…instead of that happening, THE Lisa Loeb “favorited” my tweet. Unbelievable. It was a thrill and I finally got why Twitter is kind of cool.

AND then I found the song. Here are the lyrics to “Firefly”:

http://grooveshark.com/#!/audreyassad

Wait. I’m alone sitting on this rooftop looking down at the town below. Stop. You caught me by surprise. It’s strange how Your glory can be seen in a firefly.

And the night, it’s drawing near. I dream about You as the lightning storm appears.

And the more I know of You, the more it’s clear that I never know what You are going to say. I could never know the mystery that way. You’re pulsing like a steady heartbeat, rising like a flame towards the sky. You cut the night.

What’s this? This is something new. There is a deeper beauty in this quiet side of You. And God, You’re soft, soft to the touch as I run my fingers through these fields that I love so much. You are an evening song and I’m desperately in love. But I never know, never know, what You are going to say. No, I could never know the mystery that way. You’re pulsing like a steady heartbeat, rising like a flame towards the sky. You cut the night.

I try to catch You like a falling star. But what kind of God could I contain in my jar? I feel You moving, moving through this land, so I kiss the traces of your unseen hand. Pulsing like a steady heartbeat, rising like a flame towards the sky. You cut the night. Flickering, illuminating. Moving through the universe, You’re like the firefly. You cut the night.

———————–

Whew. I, like Audrey, feel closest to God when I’m out on a rooftop, watching the fireflies or walking in a field or watching a lightning storm roll in. I love how she captured this feeling I’ve felt. This overwhelming feeling of love for a big God. I thought these lyrics were worth the search.